Tuesday, September 12, 2006

There’s so much I want to write, and there are a few reasons behind this, I haven’t really posted in quite some time, and secondly I’ve had a few experiences lately that have really just added to this emotional and spiritual vat of Fleh. (Don’t ask, just make the “fleh” noise and you’ll probably understand)

As I posted on one of my other blogs I’m going to start to rebuild myself, I have a lot to put back together, and there are some things I’m going to try to incorporate in this reconstruction. One of the things that I know will be essential will be what Samantha and I talked about, which would be to love myself no matter what; no matter what I do, my temptations, my situation with me serving a mission. Yet another factor that I need to bring in would be a stronger relationship with Christ, not built on knowledge but built on prayer and communication with Him. How can I expect to build myself on the Rock who is my Redeemer when I don’t go to Him in prayer?

Also, I was able to attend a fireside with other members of the Church who struggle with Same Sex Attraction. The person who spoke was a woman in her mid-twenties from Idaho. She was married to a man who struggled with SSA; they had a beautiful little girl. Five months after their daughter was born they were traveling home and a drunk driver hit them. Her husband and daughter died and she was in a coma for several weeks.

A few days after the accident she received a blessing by Elder Eyring and she was healed.
She showed us a statue of Christ carrying a girl that was by her bedside while she was in the hospital. I looked at it, and felt that I’ve been carried, and if I let Him now, He will carry me through what I’m facing.

We had Regional Conference on Sunday, I was mostly impressed by Elder Wirthlin’s talk about carrying on. Last month his wife passed away, and he was up there telling us to carry on, I was so impressed by his strength in that, I could tell he was hurting, that he was struggling—yet, as Pinetree pointed out, he was carrying on, exemplifying perfectly the topic he chose to speak on.

One thing that I was able to be comforted with was the fact that Christ has walked our path; He knows us and is willing to help us. He loves us, He does. He knows what we’re going through.

I need to stop writing since I have work soon and it’s going to be a long day.


Meredith said...


Samantha said...

You amaze me--and you're right--and I love you.

-L- said...

There are lots of times I've felt pretty down. They have come with varying frequencies in different stages of my life, but I'm always helped by serving others, having good caring friends, and thinking about the Savior.

I do wish you the best. Be in touch.