I'll just say that Samantha's comments were very, very timely. If we didn't talk before I hung out with The First Kiss I would've been a huge mess the ENTIRE night. Thank you.
Along the same line of things I almost threw up about four times tonight.
I really want to become this person I know I can be... but then I have all this crap that is being thrown around inside of me. I want it to go away, or atleast not having my insides being tossed around
About Me
- AttemptingthePath
- I’m a twenty-nothing who is trying desperately to figure out my seemingly complicated life that includes being a SSA/Homo/Gay/Whatever Mormon that has pathetically little control over my emotions. By day, I sell priestcrafts (“Have you heard of the new John Bytheway fireside on DVD?” It’s 20% off right now) to old women, who, in fact, think I’m quite endearing and buy four of said DVD. I’m going to pretend that the inverse of the previous statement isn’t necessary because I don’t think it’s any of your business what I do by night. I’ve been described as “adorable, yet offensive,” (OriginalMohomie, 2007) and “Immature.” (Master FOB, numerous occasions) I am still in love with Natalie Portman, hooded-sweatshirts, and quoting movies. And just like my last “about me”, this one is going to peter out at the end. Just … like … now.
3 comments:
doesn't it suck when that happens! gosh....I hate it when the inside thinks it controls the whole world of me!.....its good to remember that there is more power in you then what the world puts inside of you......if that makes sense.....I don't know...epadavito
It waasn't so long ago that I wanted to be a different person that I was, and the reality of making that happen just seemed impossible.
In time things changed, probably in two ways. It's possible that I got closer to being who I wanted. It's also more likely that I realized that who I had become was actually a good guy.
Change does happen, but probably not when you want, and certainly not how you want. I'm learning to be patient with myself and I'm accepting that my expectations for myself aren't necessarily the best ones.
Wow... thats exactly how I feel. How can I ever become the person I want to become when I am feeling so poorly about my actions and feeling like all of my goals, hopes, and dreams have disapeared... evaporated. I am really feeling blue.
-Cas
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