Friday, December 08, 2006

Okay. I'm going to make myself write something

I have no idea what's going on right now. Well I do.

--I'm having this huge uphill battle to gain back some self-worth in a spiritual sense.
--I just wrote out a check for the biggest amount ever in my entire life, it made me dizzy.
--I was accepted in the Hill Cumorah Pageant for summer '07. I feel like I should celebrate but I don't really feel deserving of receiving the call to be in the cast.
--I read the publisher's preface in In Quiet Desperation a few days ago, and came across this little gem, "There is power in the blood of Christ. not only to create worlds and part the Red Seas but also to sill the storms of the human heart."
--Last friday I was told that I haven't began to comprehend the love that God has for me. I caught a glimpse of that at FHE on Monday night when we were all singing Christmas Songs. Sitting a row over, there was this couple who has opened their house to us, I've never felt anything but love from them. Last May was the first time I met them, they opened their door and both gave me a hug, and for the first time I felt like they were hugging all who I was. It's kind of crazy that a perfect being loves all of me.
--I'm anticipating the fresh start that I'll be able to have in about four weeks.
--I still feel really empty, right now, I feel physically weak, spiritually empty, and emotionally dead. My Customer Service face is sort of taking over my life--wait...when has it NOT been on all the time?
--20 days until Samantha, Darrin, and the kids come to visit. I can't wait. I could really use one of her magical hugs :-)
--28 days until I move.
--Oh, and I purchased an argyle sweater last night. I'm not quite sure how I feel about it.

consider yourselves updated. Okay, and this is not me begging for comments, because I don't care, but have you noticed that ever since we all started chatting with eachother no one really comments anymore?


Kengo Biddles said...


I'm chatting with you right now, but I'm still posting a comment. So, pfhtfbt!

You forgot to mention that you're so excited for Ken and Barbie and the little boy on the way. ;) Because I know that we figure into your thoughts on a daily basis, because, you know, _everyone_ thinks about us. :)

Samantha said...

I can't hug you if you're wearing argyle--that's the rule! (good think I break my rules just for you)

And I'm insulted that you would say I no longer comment--I think you just don't notice. (hey--I used the tags--did you see?)

I love you AtP.

Sully said...

Argyle sweaters! In my city, those mean "emo," so I'd be a little cautious when you go out in public. That customer service face just might come in handy if you get any odd looks.

I still don't know if I'll be part of the shindig. I'm talking with my parents about it.

Thanks for the quote from "In Quiet Desperation." That was powerful. You're an awesome man, AtP.


Sir Robert Chiltern said...

I'm having this huge uphill battle to gain back some self-worth in a spiritual sense

While it may feel like an uphill battle, I think often we're too hard on ourselves and we don't remember the Savior's ability to extricate us from whatever we get ourselves into just by asking for his help (see Alma 36:12-20). Just a thought.